Monday, November 17, 2008

"For Thy Pleasure"

I have had a growing sense of peace about the miscarriage over the past week. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow, at which I am expecting to get a good report. Without going into too many details, I'll just say that everything the doctor said to expect to happen, happened last week. I never thought that I would be praising God for miscarrying, but I am grateful that it happened naturally and I do not need the DNC.

Several godly women who have been through this before have pointed me towards Scripture that helped them through their grief. Revelation 4:11 "Thou art worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honour and power: for thou hast created all things, and for thy pleasure they are and were created." God does the things that will please Him. I don't always understand it and have many moments of tantrums where, kicking and screaming, I believe that I know what is best. But who am I to question Him, the One who created me, created my husband, and through us, created our baby. Psalm 139:16 "your eyes saw my unformed body..." He wanted that precious baby with Him. He was gracious enough to share him or her with us for a few weeks, and in those weeks we had such joy knowing that we were parents to another gift from God. And as that baby was never really ours, we cannot be angry that He wanted him or her with Him. The loss still hurts and it feels like a piece of my heart is missing, but much like in the same way that Christ filled the void in my heart when I accepted Him as my Savior, my heart will be whole again when I get to Heaven. I will see my Savior face to face and will have the sweet surprise of a baby boy or girl to hold in my arms. As if eternity with the King is not enough to look forward to.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Brittany,
Here is a link to a blog post that might be a bit emotional for you but I think you will relate to it judging from your words here.

http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/2008/11/glorious-hem.html

I am glad that you are recovering.

Still praying, Aunt Cindy

Brittany @ The Rollins World said...

Thanks, Aunt Cindy. I read her story a few months back and have thought about her family many times since my sonogram, but I don't think I can handle the tears that I know reading her blog would bring me just yet. Thank you for your continued prayers.

Anonymous said...

I don't think anyone could post what you did without having God-given peace. It was beautiful. "Praise the Lord!" (in Grady's voice)